I feel somewhat passionate about Autism Awareness not because I am craving people to understand and accept my son (although that would be nice) but more so that people will understand what to look for in their own children so that they can have early intervention.
Knowing the signs, advocating for your child, and being educated on possible forms of treatment are cornerstones of helping your child with Autism have the most success possible.
I often wonder where we would be had my sister-in-law not walked this road with my niece or my child's caretaker not expressed her concerns or had I not listened to either....our road to treatment started before Calvary's third birthday.
God has perfectly created Calvary and my desire is not,and has never been, to "fix" him...Calvary sees the world in such a unique way and his faith is something of which I marvel...my desire is only to understand the world he experiences more fully so that he can enjoy it more fully as well.
The symptoms of being misunderstood have always been what has concerned me most: anxiety, irritability, and aggression.
The meltdowns are not fun. Neither is the rigidity or inability to understand waiting...but what broke my heart was knowing that my son couldn't express what he didn't understand. Sometimes because he didn't have the words to describe it, sometimes because he doesn't understand why would see things any differently, and sometimes because everything was just building and building until none of us could really pin point the trigger. All of this created fear. Fear that we wouldn't understand or that someone would expect him to hug them when he was super uncool with it or that he would have to introduce himself to someone. All of this fear and anxiety made him edgy and quick to fight. His poor body was almost constantly in fight or flight mode...he was so out of whack sensory wise that he was almost constantly on the breaking point of a meltdown.
Yet, now, through understanding why my child is different, helping to find what he needs, and fighting to have those needs met Calvary is a much, much happier child.
This is why Autism Awareness is important to me.
I cannot imagine Calvary going through his whole life feeling misunderstood. We all have moments of feeling misunderstood...those are frustrating moments...but to have one continuous line of that feeling would make any of us want to jump up and down or spin and spin until we could just drown it all out.
I also feel passionate about Awareness because how essential it is for a parent to know what their options are as far as treatment...our culture is drug happy. We want a quick fix and an easy fix. But we all know that quick fixes and easy fixes are not usually the best most lasting fixes. We can put as much tape on a leak as we want but eventually that hose is going to burst...
A year ago Calvary was diagnosed with Asperger's and a mood disorder-NOS.
At that point we were encouraged to try medication because Calvary's moods were so out of control.
We reluctantly agreed that medication was the path we needed to try. We were reluctant not because we didn't agree that medication could be needed but because it broke our hearts to realize that it was.
Although the initial effects were positive, we quickly realized that medication is not without costs. This is another reason I am a big advocate for Autism Awareness. Without being aware of other treatment options we would have been stuck in the vortex of man made pharmaceuticals...and while I am not against medication, in fact I am grateful for the gift of medication, I do believe that it should be used only as a last result.
We found an integrative doctor that combines holistic methods with western medicine (shouldn't all doctors be integrative!!?!!). She found that Calvary has a gluten intolerance as well as an iron store deficiency. Since Calvary, and Kyle, switched to a gluten free diet we have been able to go med free! Calvary's mood is much more stable now and he is far less anxious. He also demonstrates far less rigidity and OCD tendencies.
Awareness means so much more than just knowing that children or adults around you may be autistic. Awareness should lead to understanding. Understanding Calvary makes me a much more effective advocate for him because now I am not trying to fix him; I am trying to bridge the gap.
A year ago we had a therapist sit in a room with me and solemnly tell me that not only does my son have Aspergers but that he also had a mood disorder. She went on to sympathetically offer her support for the meltdowns that we were accustomed to navigating. Her tone, all though very gentle and supportive, left me feeling very hopeless. My faith was rocked and it took me quite a while to remember that God is in control. I stopped letting fear be my guide and started looking to God...
2 weeks ago Calvary's therapist sat in amazement of Calvary's progress.
I believe that choosing faith over fear and realizing that being aware of what Autism is and how it can be treated is a huge reason for how much he is thriving.
My prayer is that I will continue to grow and learn so that as his mother I can thrive as well. Autism Awareness should be so much more than just knowing statistics; it should be an ongoing process of education and acceptance.
1 comment:
Yes!! Stated so well! Thank you Cassie!
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