life's lessons...

earlier this morning i was speaking with my mother on the phone and we were talking about my current parenting issue of bedtime with my oldest two. don't let anyone fool you; bunk beds are the devil. but now we are too far in to change what we have going for us. i mean how many times can you uproot children and change around their sleeping situation before you can just give up on sleep time sanity for the rest of their residence in their parental home?


we've already exhausted all of the rooms in our home so far, so the options are limited...


exhibit a:






anyway, at one point during the conversation i referenced something i had gained through my experience as a high school teacher. i jokingly told my mother, "actually, everything i know about parenting i have learned from teaching high school." but the more i thought about it, the more i realized that i have actually garnered some very practical experience through my time in the trenches with high school students.

things i have learned about parenting from teaching high school students:

1. always be prepared. preparation is key. if there is ever a down moment all control will be lost and it will be near impossible to gain it back.
2. if you are not prepared, expect chaos. planned activities, even if they go desperately awry are always better than untamed chaos in a confined space.
3. never let them see you cry. oh, you may think that crying will let them know that they have really hurt you or driven you to the point of complete frustration but the reality is that all they will truly gain from seeing you cry is a sick satisfaction of power. if you've ever been around kids you know how truly sadistic they can be...
4. the same goes for yelling. once they get over the initial shock, all they will feel is power.
5. plan around different personalities and learning styles. some kids learn from hands on projects. some kids learn from lecture. some kids learn while running around and lack the ability to sit still for any amount of time. some kids will be lazy if given the opportunity to be lazy.
6. teenagers operate on lots of praise. sure it can be easy (way too easy) to focus on all of the annoying things that they do or are doing, but the quickest way to get a teenager to do what is expected of you is to find the ways that they already are and praise them for it. once they think they cannot please you, they will quit trying.
7. never blur the line between authority and friend. high schoolers LOVE the class where the teacher is their friend, but they remember the class that taught them more about themselves and prepared them for the future.
8. don't forget that authority must be approachable. there is a thin line between blurring the line and becoming too friendly and making yourself appear like a tyrant. grown-ups love power too.
9. pray, pray, pray! no matter how prepared, composed, or strong you are the battle becomes too much sometimes...
10. remember the good times! sometimes i would leave school and wonder why in the world i would do the things i did. i would wonder if i did enough. i would wonder if it even mattered. i would feel defeated. but then, like a heaven sent angel, one of those mean little high schoolers would do something that would remind me that it did matter.

i always thought that teaching was more a lifestyle than a job, but i never knew how much it truly affected my world view! my time in the trenches taught me what characteristics i thought were worth fighting for and what things truly were not important. the strangest thing i learned is the parallel between teenagers and toddlers. they really aren't that different. minus the sex, drugs, alcohol, body image, and self worth issues teenagers are really just big stretched out toddlers. just don't tell them that.