Things I am loving about this week:
1. Having field trips with my friend/ fellow homeschool mom.
2. Getting a chance to be crafty...even if it means that I am getting very little sleep...with another friend to raise funds for Costa Rica.
3. Signing Kyle up for his immersion Spanish class.
4. Calvary calling Alli to ask her to make his birthday cake. Phone talking is not his strength and he really didn't want to do it, but he did! Of course Alli had already graciously agreed to make him a cake because she loves him...but he didn't know that ;)
5. Having Alli around for many reasons...just a few reasons are because she is an amazing gf baker, her work on our tshirts, and just her overall willingness to help us...we are so grateful.
6. Cleaning off our back deck from the layer of pollen that covered it so that we can now sit out there and do class or drink coffee...love it...
7. Finley and Oliver Jack "reading" their Bible during Bible time. Finley will say, "where do you want me to turn? Corinthians or blue?"
8. Watching my kids play in the sprinkler and with water balloons. We are for sure a summertime family...these kids love warm weather, water, flowers, and being outside giggling and having a good time.
9. Popsicles.
10. Wearing flip flops.
11. Oliver Jack's desire to buy Calvary a birthday present. He has been saving his money and he wants to use it to buy a present and it just makes my heart swoon to see them be so loving to each other.
12. Finley following Oliver Jack around wherever he goes and sitting right beside him on the couch. He pushed her up the hill on his bike yesterday and then ran behind her to "make sure she didn't suddenly jump off".
13. Harper's desire to craft and work with me. She is at the age where is so aware of what is going on and what is being said and wants to be a part of every decision making conversation...sometimes it is aggravating to be honest...but other times it is so sweet to see how much she loves and admires us...if only I could actually deserve that type of admiration.
14. Listening to Oliver Jack and Finley count. They are really into counting right now and they love to count EVERYTHING!
15. Mowing the grass and getting the yard tidied up.
16. Working in the nursery at church.
17. My kids in summer clothes...little girls in summer dresses and little boys in plaid shorts...so sweet.
18. Finley recognizing her name when it is written.
19. Harper's attention to details of picking out her clothes. She loves to put outfits together and try and make things coordinate. Love this part of her getting older.
Friday, April 12, 2013
Friday, April 5, 2013
Friday's musings...
Things I am loving about this week:
1. Spring Break! I got so much laundry done and cleaning done...I am not going to focus on how getting laundry done is a sad barometer of fun...instead I am choosing to focus on how liberating it feels to be caught up on the task!
2. Finley feeling better....she was down from Tuesday night to Monday afternoon with a stomach bug.
3. Watching the kids do Easter egg hunts & finding their Easter baskets.
4. Calvary's excitement over new socks.
5. Oliver Jack saying, "do that 'courageous" thing momma" when I tuck him in at night...I tell him, "You are a kind boy. You are a loving boy. You are a brave boy. You are a courageous boy." He loves it...I love how sweetly he gobbles up those words of affirmation...
6. Kyle's mystery trip he planned and surprised us with last week...not this week, but I didn't muse last week so I had to include it here!...it was so fun. He took us to the zoo, an arcade, and to make it all the more awesome we stayed overnight in a hotel with an indoor pool...the kids loved it!
7. Meeting new people through the common goal of ministry. I have been so humbled by the amount of people willing to help us and educate us as we begin this journey.
8. Christy's new Pygmy goat.
9. Hearing Calvary sing. He has such a beautiful little voice and he always sings worship songs. I just love it so much.
10. Finley not refusing to poop in the potty anymore.
11. Oliver Jack taking care of Finley. He loves her so much...even though she can be so feisty sometimes!
12. Harper telling me that she doesn't want me to go somewhere because she "likes to be around me"...
13. The kids being able to get outside and play and climb trees...
14. Calvary and Oliver Jack playing together. Oliver Jack is learning Calvary's quirks; he knows that Calvary has a difficult time coming up with ideas on his own and he has heard me give Calvary options...so now I overhear Oliver Jack say, "Calvary, here are your options: we can play Legos or we can color. Which do you choose?" Calvary always picks one and off they go!
15. Eating dinner at a restaurant other than fast food...it was a long, long time since we have gone out and it was so nice!
16. Having Chloe and Emmi come over and doing a sewing project...we all had a great time and it was so funny to watch all of the kids sew, paint, and be so proud of their finished products...
17. The kids excitement when Kyle gets home after work.
18. Starting to make tangible steps to get ready for Costa Rica. Making plans for our house, selling or giving away our stuff, and starting to plan fundraisers are making all of this become increasingly real and that much more exciting.
1. Spring Break! I got so much laundry done and cleaning done...I am not going to focus on how getting laundry done is a sad barometer of fun...instead I am choosing to focus on how liberating it feels to be caught up on the task!
2. Finley feeling better....she was down from Tuesday night to Monday afternoon with a stomach bug.
3. Watching the kids do Easter egg hunts & finding their Easter baskets.
4. Calvary's excitement over new socks.
5. Oliver Jack saying, "do that 'courageous" thing momma" when I tuck him in at night...I tell him, "You are a kind boy. You are a loving boy. You are a brave boy. You are a courageous boy." He loves it...I love how sweetly he gobbles up those words of affirmation...
6. Kyle's mystery trip he planned and surprised us with last week...not this week, but I didn't muse last week so I had to include it here!...it was so fun. He took us to the zoo, an arcade, and to make it all the more awesome we stayed overnight in a hotel with an indoor pool...the kids loved it!
7. Meeting new people through the common goal of ministry. I have been so humbled by the amount of people willing to help us and educate us as we begin this journey.
8. Christy's new Pygmy goat.
9. Hearing Calvary sing. He has such a beautiful little voice and he always sings worship songs. I just love it so much.
10. Finley not refusing to poop in the potty anymore.
11. Oliver Jack taking care of Finley. He loves her so much...even though she can be so feisty sometimes!
12. Harper telling me that she doesn't want me to go somewhere because she "likes to be around me"...
13. The kids being able to get outside and play and climb trees...
14. Calvary and Oliver Jack playing together. Oliver Jack is learning Calvary's quirks; he knows that Calvary has a difficult time coming up with ideas on his own and he has heard me give Calvary options...so now I overhear Oliver Jack say, "Calvary, here are your options: we can play Legos or we can color. Which do you choose?" Calvary always picks one and off they go!
15. Eating dinner at a restaurant other than fast food...it was a long, long time since we have gone out and it was so nice!
16. Having Chloe and Emmi come over and doing a sewing project...we all had a great time and it was so funny to watch all of the kids sew, paint, and be so proud of their finished products...
17. The kids excitement when Kyle gets home after work.
18. Starting to make tangible steps to get ready for Costa Rica. Making plans for our house, selling or giving away our stuff, and starting to plan fundraisers are making all of this become increasingly real and that much more exciting.
Monday, April 1, 2013
April....
It is kind of perfect that April is Autism Awareness Month because it is also the month of Calvary's birthday...it basically is a month for him :)
I feel somewhat passionate about Autism Awareness not because I am craving people to understand and accept my son (although that would be nice) but more so that people will understand what to look for in their own children so that they can have early intervention.
Knowing the signs, advocating for your child, and being educated on possible forms of treatment are cornerstones of helping your child with Autism have the most success possible.
I often wonder where we would be had my sister-in-law not walked this road with my niece or my child's caretaker not expressed her concerns or had I not listened to either....our road to treatment started before Calvary's third birthday.
God has perfectly created Calvary and my desire is not,and has never been, to "fix" him...Calvary sees the world in such a unique way and his faith is something of which I marvel...my desire is only to understand the world he experiences more fully so that he can enjoy it more fully as well.
The symptoms of being misunderstood have always been what has concerned me most: anxiety, irritability, and aggression.
The meltdowns are not fun. Neither is the rigidity or inability to understand waiting...but what broke my heart was knowing that my son couldn't express what he didn't understand. Sometimes because he didn't have the words to describe it, sometimes because he doesn't understand why would see things any differently, and sometimes because everything was just building and building until none of us could really pin point the trigger. All of this created fear. Fear that we wouldn't understand or that someone would expect him to hug them when he was super uncool with it or that he would have to introduce himself to someone. All of this fear and anxiety made him edgy and quick to fight. His poor body was almost constantly in fight or flight mode...he was so out of whack sensory wise that he was almost constantly on the breaking point of a meltdown.
Yet, now, through understanding why my child is different, helping to find what he needs, and fighting to have those needs met Calvary is a much, much happier child.
This is why Autism Awareness is important to me.
I cannot imagine Calvary going through his whole life feeling misunderstood. We all have moments of feeling misunderstood...those are frustrating moments...but to have one continuous line of that feeling would make any of us want to jump up and down or spin and spin until we could just drown it all out.
I also feel passionate about Awareness because how essential it is for a parent to know what their options are as far as treatment...our culture is drug happy. We want a quick fix and an easy fix. But we all know that quick fixes and easy fixes are not usually the best most lasting fixes. We can put as much tape on a leak as we want but eventually that hose is going to burst...
A year ago Calvary was diagnosed with Asperger's and a mood disorder-NOS.
At that point we were encouraged to try medication because Calvary's moods were so out of control.
We reluctantly agreed that medication was the path we needed to try. We were reluctant not because we didn't agree that medication could be needed but because it broke our hearts to realize that it was.
Although the initial effects were positive, we quickly realized that medication is not without costs. This is another reason I am a big advocate for Autism Awareness. Without being aware of other treatment options we would have been stuck in the vortex of man made pharmaceuticals...and while I am not against medication, in fact I am grateful for the gift of medication, I do believe that it should be used only as a last result.
We found an integrative doctor that combines holistic methods with western medicine (shouldn't all doctors be integrative!!?!!). She found that Calvary has a gluten intolerance as well as an iron store deficiency. Since Calvary, and Kyle, switched to a gluten free diet we have been able to go med free! Calvary's mood is much more stable now and he is far less anxious. He also demonstrates far less rigidity and OCD tendencies.
Awareness means so much more than just knowing that children or adults around you may be autistic. Awareness should lead to understanding. Understanding Calvary makes me a much more effective advocate for him because now I am not trying to fix him; I am trying to bridge the gap.
A year ago we had a therapist sit in a room with me and solemnly tell me that not only does my son have Aspergers but that he also had a mood disorder. She went on to sympathetically offer her support for the meltdowns that we were accustomed to navigating. Her tone, all though very gentle and supportive, left me feeling very hopeless. My faith was rocked and it took me quite a while to remember that God is in control. I stopped letting fear be my guide and started looking to God...
2 weeks ago Calvary's therapist sat in amazement of Calvary's progress.
I believe that choosing faith over fear and realizing that being aware of what Autism is and how it can be treated is a huge reason for how much he is thriving.
My prayer is that I will continue to grow and learn so that as his mother I can thrive as well. Autism Awareness should be so much more than just knowing statistics; it should be an ongoing process of education and acceptance.
I feel somewhat passionate about Autism Awareness not because I am craving people to understand and accept my son (although that would be nice) but more so that people will understand what to look for in their own children so that they can have early intervention.
Knowing the signs, advocating for your child, and being educated on possible forms of treatment are cornerstones of helping your child with Autism have the most success possible.
I often wonder where we would be had my sister-in-law not walked this road with my niece or my child's caretaker not expressed her concerns or had I not listened to either....our road to treatment started before Calvary's third birthday.
God has perfectly created Calvary and my desire is not,and has never been, to "fix" him...Calvary sees the world in such a unique way and his faith is something of which I marvel...my desire is only to understand the world he experiences more fully so that he can enjoy it more fully as well.
The symptoms of being misunderstood have always been what has concerned me most: anxiety, irritability, and aggression.
The meltdowns are not fun. Neither is the rigidity or inability to understand waiting...but what broke my heart was knowing that my son couldn't express what he didn't understand. Sometimes because he didn't have the words to describe it, sometimes because he doesn't understand why would see things any differently, and sometimes because everything was just building and building until none of us could really pin point the trigger. All of this created fear. Fear that we wouldn't understand or that someone would expect him to hug them when he was super uncool with it or that he would have to introduce himself to someone. All of this fear and anxiety made him edgy and quick to fight. His poor body was almost constantly in fight or flight mode...he was so out of whack sensory wise that he was almost constantly on the breaking point of a meltdown.
Yet, now, through understanding why my child is different, helping to find what he needs, and fighting to have those needs met Calvary is a much, much happier child.
This is why Autism Awareness is important to me.
I cannot imagine Calvary going through his whole life feeling misunderstood. We all have moments of feeling misunderstood...those are frustrating moments...but to have one continuous line of that feeling would make any of us want to jump up and down or spin and spin until we could just drown it all out.
I also feel passionate about Awareness because how essential it is for a parent to know what their options are as far as treatment...our culture is drug happy. We want a quick fix and an easy fix. But we all know that quick fixes and easy fixes are not usually the best most lasting fixes. We can put as much tape on a leak as we want but eventually that hose is going to burst...
A year ago Calvary was diagnosed with Asperger's and a mood disorder-NOS.
At that point we were encouraged to try medication because Calvary's moods were so out of control.
We reluctantly agreed that medication was the path we needed to try. We were reluctant not because we didn't agree that medication could be needed but because it broke our hearts to realize that it was.
Although the initial effects were positive, we quickly realized that medication is not without costs. This is another reason I am a big advocate for Autism Awareness. Without being aware of other treatment options we would have been stuck in the vortex of man made pharmaceuticals...and while I am not against medication, in fact I am grateful for the gift of medication, I do believe that it should be used only as a last result.
We found an integrative doctor that combines holistic methods with western medicine (shouldn't all doctors be integrative!!?!!). She found that Calvary has a gluten intolerance as well as an iron store deficiency. Since Calvary, and Kyle, switched to a gluten free diet we have been able to go med free! Calvary's mood is much more stable now and he is far less anxious. He also demonstrates far less rigidity and OCD tendencies.
Awareness means so much more than just knowing that children or adults around you may be autistic. Awareness should lead to understanding. Understanding Calvary makes me a much more effective advocate for him because now I am not trying to fix him; I am trying to bridge the gap.
A year ago we had a therapist sit in a room with me and solemnly tell me that not only does my son have Aspergers but that he also had a mood disorder. She went on to sympathetically offer her support for the meltdowns that we were accustomed to navigating. Her tone, all though very gentle and supportive, left me feeling very hopeless. My faith was rocked and it took me quite a while to remember that God is in control. I stopped letting fear be my guide and started looking to God...
2 weeks ago Calvary's therapist sat in amazement of Calvary's progress.
I believe that choosing faith over fear and realizing that being aware of what Autism is and how it can be treated is a huge reason for how much he is thriving.
My prayer is that I will continue to grow and learn so that as his mother I can thrive as well. Autism Awareness should be so much more than just knowing statistics; it should be an ongoing process of education and acceptance.
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